...every night when I was living in Georgia I went on a walk. Usually about an hour. I lived out in the middle of the woods, away from any signs of society and prosperity - so the only thing I had to worry about was bears. Although I am still pretty sure that no bear ever came near me, the deer used to startle me often. Those guys are pretty used to having people close-ish, so they wouldnt react until you got REALLY close, then they would let out one quick breath and take off running. No matter how many hour long walks I went on, every time I thought it was mama bear ready to maul me.
Funny thing is that I knew that as soon as I left the North Georgia mountains, I would miss that walk. Bear-fright and all.
What sparked that nightly walk was a conversation that I had with a friend of mine - we
promised eachother that we would take a walk every night and think, ponder, pray about something as we walked throught the darkness. Darkness is a funny thing - although unnerving at times, it is also soothing and free of distractions. With the exception of the snorting does, of course.
When I moved to Denver, I didnt think Id ever have that silence, that solitude, that darkness anymore. I kind of gave up. I nixed the nightly walk.
Tonight I walked. Walked through the urban jungle. Walked alone. Although, some things have changed. The situation that I was pondering in Georgia ceases to exist. The bears and deer live far outside of my newish realm. The darkness has been replaced by halogen street lamps.
But solidute still exists in this urban wilderness I live in. Its not all-encompassing like the woods of Georgia. But now that I know my neighborhood, now that I know the traffic patterns, now that I fear strangers like I feared the bears, some things seem remote again. I can walk on a street that isnt a major thoroughfare. I can be on my toes waiting for street people. I can talk with myself and not fear onlookers. Onlisteners.
Tonight I found that I am still in the wilderness. Things havent changed, I have. But I can still find that same solitude, I can still find that same conversation, I can still find that same stillness. In the middle of the city.
Funny thing is that I knew that as soon as I left the North Georgia mountains, I would miss that walk. Bear-fright and all.
What sparked that nightly walk was a conversation that I had with a friend of mine - we
promised eachother that we would take a walk every night and think, ponder, pray about something as we walked throught the darkness. Darkness is a funny thing - although unnerving at times, it is also soothing and free of distractions. With the exception of the snorting does, of course.When I moved to Denver, I didnt think Id ever have that silence, that solitude, that darkness anymore. I kind of gave up. I nixed the nightly walk.
Tonight I walked. Walked through the urban jungle. Walked alone. Although, some things have changed. The situation that I was pondering in Georgia ceases to exist. The bears and deer live far outside of my newish realm. The darkness has been replaced by halogen street lamps.
But solidute still exists in this urban wilderness I live in. Its not all-encompassing like the woods of Georgia. But now that I know my neighborhood, now that I know the traffic patterns, now that I fear strangers like I feared the bears, some things seem remote again. I can walk on a street that isnt a major thoroughfare. I can be on my toes waiting for street people. I can talk with myself and not fear onlookers. Onlisteners.
Tonight I found that I am still in the wilderness. Things havent changed, I have. But I can still find that same solitude, I can still find that same conversation, I can still find that same stillness. In the middle of the city.
1 comment:
beautiful thoughts and beautiful words. however, safety mom still wants you tucked in bed by 11 p.m. each evening. i'm just sayin'...but, i'm glad you're finding your stillness amidst the chaos.
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