If you know...

...me well, I've probably cooked for you in the past. I love to cook. I love to feed. I love to eat. And there have been a few recipes that I have done well with in the past: Stuffed Chicken Parmesan, Penne and Pesto, Sticky Rice, Migas, Breakfast Burritos, Peasant's Meal...but now I think I have the perfect recipe. But the pre-preparation is as important as the actual ingredients, technique, and preparation. Here it goes...

Blackened Pizza Surprise:

1. Dress like an participant of Pamplona's Running of the Bulls with some of your friends. Make sure that somebody actually dresses like a bull or you might lose a little of the flair.

2. Drink German beer from a funnel. Nevermind the fact that you haven't done this since highschool (you know, substituting "German" with "Cheap Domestic").

3. Play flipcup with all of the Runners, this time using Wynkoop's not so light beer.

4. Repeat step #2.

5. Go to Halloween Party with 400 other people, but make sure to bring a waterbottle full of moonshine (really). Not because you are too cheap to buy drinks, but because you don't want to wait in line (you aren't fooling anyone, though).

6. Dance a lot. Get really sweaty. Yeah.

7. Find guy dressed as Jose Cuervo and take shots of tequila using his provided booze and shot glasses.

8. Repeat step #6.

9. Walk home when its time. But make a detour to King Soopers to pick up a frozen pizza. Nevermind that you are lactose intolerant.

10. Set oven at instructed temperature. Place pizza on a cookie sheet (preheated) as to avoid making a cheese mess in the oven. Set time according to instructions.

11. Lay down on the couch. Because, in your state, you will definitely hear the buzzer go off.

12. Five hours later make sure your roommate comes down stairs to turn off oven.

13. Two more hours later get off the couch, wonder who the heck tried to make a pizza, go upstairs to bed.

There you go, the perfect recipe. Don't try that at your home.